Always Fighting

   I'm baaack! Book was fantastic. Finished yesterday afternoon. Now, new readers, please read Introducing Me when you can, along with other posts that look interesting to you. And returning readers, Welcome Back! Sorry it took a bit.

   Now I'm writing something I've been wanting to say for a while. For months actually. So why not here? Here it is: My friends, especially my closest ones, are more than family to me. I don't call them sisters, cause that's not a good enough word for them. They're my best friends.
   Which means, you hurt them, I won't tolerate it. Now, I don't really mind it if someone doesn't like me. I'm used to it and, while it's hard to swallow, I can get through it. But, you insult one of my family, I will hunt you down.
   Also, it doesn't really matter if I'm not close to you and we're just acquaintances. There was this girl I didn't get along with and most everyone could tell. But, I don't think I really snapped until she was picking on someone I sort-of knew. Then I told her exactly what I thought. She definitely didn't like me after that, but I was pretty darn happy I did that.
   Sometimes I'm still stunned I did it, though. I mean, thankfully there haven't been many times I've had to do that. But, other than some fights at home, I barely ever snap like that.
   Maybe it means I'm growing up. Standing up for others has always been my priority, even before standing up for myself. I know I can actually do it, even if I hate myself after for getting so angry. I've even gotten angry at my close friends, but that's really only been if they're hiding something, which I can typically tell even if I don't push about it.

   Honestly, I'm slightly scared at what may happen if I ever see Carmen again, the girl who may as well have literally stabbed me in the back. I know I'll be mad, though I'll do my best not to show it. I'm just scared of what might happen if she insults my family. Will I just tense up with anger or will I slap her across the face? I don't like either prospect, but one would happen. It'd send me into emotional torment, probably, but I think, overall, it'd be okay.
   Nora, Violet, and Abigail mean the world to me. They're my best friends and I'll fight like hell to keep them. Keep them safe and keep them okay. I don't want to see them hurt. Not at my expense. And I've hurt them myself a few times. Yes, to follow those hunches, but it doesn't hurt any less.
   It's gonna hurt saying goodbye to them in some weeks time. We'll be going on our separate paths. We'll keep in contact, but things get busy. Life just happens to be that way.

   I'll never forget them. In some way, maybe more than one, they've saved my life. I've never wanted to die, but I didn't feel right for years. I always felt like something was missing. I couldn't figure out what it was. And one day I did. Or maybe it happened over time. But my instincts tell me it was because of them.
   Guys, if you're reading this, thank you again. I'll never stop saying it, and I'll never stop meaning it.

-Kayla

(PS. Oh, and dear readers? I'll fight for you, too. Cause that's the kind of girl I am.)